Southern Discomfort: KaHLaN vs. Metal Dragon vs. Strife

[Vladimir Strife]

As the three competitors stand in their respective corners, each shifting glances between their two opponents, the Concord crowd grows quiet, readying themselves for what it assured to be a great contest. The seconds that pass feel like minutes in the moment, until the shrill chime of the bell calls out to officially begin the match. Before it's resonance has had a chance to fade, Metal Dragon drops down to the mat and rolls under the bottom rope, exiting the ring without a moment's hesitance. Strife looks to him, confused, but is reminded of the dangers of taking his focus off of an opponent for even the briefest span. KaHLaN comes barreling out of her corner and flings herself into the air halfway across the ring, raising up her forearm before her and bringing it down across Vladimir's cheek, sending him reeling into the corner. There's no time for the Czar of Scars to register what has just happened before Lil K is upon him, firing away with a barrage of strikes that starts with punches and slaps and work into stiff boots to his abdomen. Meanwhile, outside the ring, a cheeky Metal Dragon unscrews the cap from the SoCo and helps himself to a swig from the bottle, getting a headstart on his opponent's in escaping sobriety.

JP: KaHLaN comes out like a hellcat here, just laying into the GodKing while Metal Dragon predictably shows more interest in the booze than fighting either of them.
Ray: You think he'd share with me?
JP: What? Shut up, Ray. We both know that isn't water in your sports bottle anyhow..

In the ring, Strife is finally able to catch KaHLaN's leg, staving off her onslaught long enough that he can swing an elbow forward into her jaw and rattle her, leaving her stunned. The follow up comes shortly thereafter with more strength behind it, dropping her to the canvas and giving himself some room to breathe. As she goes to sit up, the Barbarian Lord reminds her of how he's earned such a moniker, stamping down onto her nose and driving the back of her head down against the mat. Her hands shoot up to cover her face and she rolls onto her side, needing time to recover from the brutal move. Luckily for her, Metal Dragon buys her such time as he enters the fray, stepping in behind Vlad and wrapping his arms around his waist before hoisting him into the air and over his head, sending the Romanian crashing down onto his shoulders with a thud that reverberates through the gymnasium. Strife tries to pull himself up quickly, but simply makes himself easy pickings in his disoriented state, allowing Dragon to drive the wing of his boot into his gut and double him over before pulling him in and dropping him with a snap DDT with no resistance.

Ray: Never underestimate Metal Dragon with a little bit of liquid courage!
JP: It may be working in his favor now, but one has to wonder if he might end up paying for getting an early start on that as the match goes on.

The American wastes no time in going for the first victory in the world war, rolling KaHLaN onto her back and hooking her leg for a pinfall.

ONE!

TWO!

KaHLaN powers her way out, spurning his attempt. The multi-time tag champion grabs her by the back of the head and drags her up to her feet despite her protests before unceremoniously tossing her over the top rope and down into a recovering GodKing, the pair collapsing into a heap on the outside mats while Dragon plays up his early advantage with the crowd, eliciting a mixture of boos and mostly cheers.

((Figured I'd keep the first one short since no one else has posted yet and I don't know if you fucks will bail on me.))

TBCB K or MD

[Wolverina]

Suddenly there's an even bigger commotion in the stands and the source is revealed a short time later as Wolverina slips over the barricade clad in jeans, a white Jared Nathan "Charlie Sheen Face" shirt, and Reebok sneakers. Fit and hot as ever, the People's Princess howls as the fans go bonkers for her, then plods forward without regard for the Tennessean in the ring. Vlad is on his hands and knees already, and she steps on him rather disrespectfully, then wipes her feet and stomps on the nape of his neck. 

Continuing on, her eyes narrow and her heart thumps even more rapidly as her long time nemesis, Kahlan, rises to her feet recovering. When the wild haired harlot turns toward her, Wolfie lites into her like a Tasmanian devil with punches and kicks and every type of strike that can be dealt with every part of her body. From head to toe, Kahlan is shocked, hurt, and overwhelmed as the crowd goes bat shit crazy with cheers. 

JP: WOLFIE'S BACK! SHE'S HERE AND SHE'S GOING TO SETTLE THE SCORE WITH KAHLAN ONCE AND FOR ALL!
Ray: Just when things were going good, this bitch shows up. Oh well, at least she's not riding a high horse this time. I hope Kahlan beats her for the 14..15...20th time i dunno how many times she's bested Wolverina. 

Wolverina isn't playing nice this time and goes right for eyes, digging deep into them and twisting, ripping and pulling at the English woman's oculars. Little K wails in her misery, still clueless to who is actually attacking her due to the swiftness of the attacks. Wolfie cracks her in the temple with a Rick Grimes style headbutt, spinning Pretty K away from for her. Seizing the advantage, Wolfie locks her in a waist lock from behind and heaves her up and over with great exertion... right onto the ring steps. K's flimsy body rockets off and spins before resting in a heap on the shitty quarter inch floor padding that Vlad and KB never bothered improving. The Ladder Queen lies motionless, seemingly out of the contest. Wolverina doesn't seem to care how wounded her ambush victim is and goes about trying to rip the top steps off to bash K's brains out with. 

*CRACCCK*

A warm jolt of pain flies up Wolfie's spine and she falls. The crowd jeers as the Godking stands above her, and he is pissed. 

Vlad: I don't remember booking you, bitch. Get the fuck out of my fight. 

He yanks the intruder up by her dark tresses and pounds her head into the same ring steps she just used on Kahlan, then turns and hurls her into the first few rows of the fans. Sitting pretty as a peach through all this, Metal Dragon perches atop the highest buckle and takes wing at just the right time. It's not his wheelhouse to be flying around, but he's getting liquored up and feeling pretty damn adventurous right about now. 

Until Vlad side steps and he crash lands. The Czar of Scars belts a scoffing little laugh then busies his boots across the American's midriff, before pulling him up and whipping him hard into the railing, the force enough to send the steel into the shins of first row fans. Dragon slumps but shows his fighting spirit by remaining somewhat vertical. Vlad chugs forward, gaining a good bit of speed toward him. When in striking range, Strife leaps but Dragon moves. The Barbarian Lord manages to correct himself in flight and, in a rare scene of balance, manages to land atop the rail. He teeters of course, but hurls himself back at Dragon, noosing him around the head and neck and driving him straight into the piss poor padding with a DDT. 

The Romanian Scourge stands dominant like so many times before and roars to let people know it. Out of the corner of his eye he sees her coming, but is far too late to stop the Super Woman Punch that sends his world spinning. Wolfie was back in the fight and clearly irked that Vladimir had interrupted her revenge on Lil K. His back dings the edge of the ring, alerting him to the distance he could gain. Before Wolfie can offer more attack, he rolls inside the ring and stumbles back to his feet. 

But he is not quick enough. His dizziness has puts him off balance and Wolverina rips him to the ground a charging Spear of the ages. He goes rolling away, nursing his tummy. Wolfie takes a moment to she-wolf howl for perhaps the last time in this sacred ring. The fans respond in kind like they always have, and give her their support. 

Out of nowhere Kahlan comes hurtling back into the scene behind her, soaring through the air after using the top ring rope as a launching pad. As she plummets down, she wrangles Wolfie at the head and doubles her knees into her back. The move is one made legendary by the Ladder Queen. It's a move that has finished Wolverina countless times before, with the People's Princess never finding a counter for it. 

This night is no different. Little K allows gravity to do the rest and soon Wolfie is plunged into unbearable pain before sudden darkness. The Special K finisher had struck again, rendering Wolverina out cold flat on her face. 

JP: Damn it that sneaky Kahlan! Don't tell me she's gonna get one more over on Wolverina! Not now!
Ray: I think she is, she's going for the cover hehe. 

Kahlan drapes her body across Wolfie's and hooks her leg in the tightest, most painful looking leg hook in pin attempt history. The referee slides into position, seemingly unaware that Wolverina is illegal in the match itself. But hey, it's EVPW and crazy stuff happens all the time, right? 

1





2




3!!!! 

JP: Little K's done it again!
Ray: Hehehe yeees, take that wolf bitch. 
JP: We still have plenty of time left, anything can happen. Whoever has the last fall when the last second hits, wins. 

While K enjoys another triumph over Wolverina, Metal Dragon scurries into the ring undetected, and that match is his for the taking.