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Post by Vladimir Strife on Feb 17, 2015 17:34:36 GMT -4
Due: February 24th, 9:00PM Pacific/12:00AM Eastern
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Post by Vladimir Strife on Feb 21, 2015 23:06:35 GMT -4
The bell rings and the Concord crowd sits around the arena, watching with indifference as the two rookie newcomers, Fuckberry and the Ontario Chicken Strangler, kick off the second match of the evening. The men, each untested and racked with nerves, begin to circle the ring, taking their time and fearing moving in on one another in light of the brutality they'd each witnessed in the previous contest. A chant begins to rise, fans crying out "GET THE FUCK OUT!" and clapping and stomping, serving only to raise the level of pressure on the competitors. Slowly, they start to inch toward one another, baby steps bringing them ever closer toward the center of the squared circle as even the referee leans against the ropes and rolls his eyes. As they have almost closed the gap, a song strikes up through the PA, causing them to stop in their confusion and turn their heads toward it.
It builds, fans and the stars staring toward the entrance in baited anticipation until the curtain begins to part. To the shock of everyone, the muzzled head of a brown bear pokes out, gazing around before walking out, revealing it's incredible mass. It makes it's way to the ring as fans stand up and scoot away, terrified of the wild animal. It pokes it's head under the bottom rope, unclawed paws slapping at the canvas, desperate for leverage as it pulls itself into the ring, the lowest cable bending drastically to accommodate it's size.
The men, uncertain of what to do, back away as the beast rises onto it's haunches, then launch themselves forward at it. The bear slaps one of them with a vicious right, batting Fuckberry to the mat and sending him rolling out. It presses it's weight against the oncoming Chicken Strangler, forcing him down to the mat. The creature stares over at the referee, who does the only thing he can think of and drops to the mat, slapping it thrice before calling for the bell and getting the fuck out of dodge.
Lizzie lifts up the microphone, but looks uncertain of what, if anything, she should say, but a different voice soon comes out.
"Ladies and Gentlemen.. the winner of this match.."
Devin Bozz emerges from the backstage area.
"The QueenBear - HONEY!!"
"Wait, seriously? Honey!? I couldn't tell! I just thought it was some random bear!"
"Whoa... seriously.. you're going to go there, Jimmy?"
"What? How the hell was I supposed to know? They all look the same."
"Oh, there it is. Real lovely, you fucking racist."
"WHAT!? WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?"
"I bet you would it wouldn't have looked the same to you it if was a Polar Bear!"
"How c-"
"WHITE BEAR PRIVILEGE!"
"Oh my god, would you please shut the hell up.."
"Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm going to level with you here. I have a business to run. So, from this point on, if you're not entertaining the crowd.. if you're boring them and taking too long.. You're going to be answering to our new Enforcer of Entertainment Standards - the lovely QueenBear! So, have a wonderful night, enjoy the show, and make damn sure you're giving it your all out there, because our sweet little EES is already a bit disappointed with what she's seen and I'm sure she's more than eager to come back out here again if she has to!"
((So, this was a quick way to introduce this, but since we've decided that there will no longer be kayfabe no-shows, there had to be an answer for matches where neither guy shows up. And here it is. You double no-show and Honey gets dinner. Also, if your match isn't doing so well and I happen to feel like roleplaying as a bear, there's a strong possibility of it being changed to accommodate the biggest bear-related name in EVPW history, the wonderful QueenBear.))
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