Post by Howard Bernstein on Sept 14, 2014 18:16:25 GMT -4
The scene opens to a scrum of reporters just outside the front of Napa County airport, just under an hour drive from Concord, California. The group of cameras, microphones, and men who look like they've been waiting out in the hot California sun for hours, all look as though they're trying to climb over one another to get any level of footing. Just to the side of the commotion stands a relatively tall African American man. Unlike the rest of the group, he stands tall and without a bead of sweat as if he had just arrived.
Sean De Murray
Sean De Murray here with the Associated Press. I'm outside of Napa County airport where Howard Bernstein, Hollywood agent of a number of recently disgraced NFL superstars, has just landed. The big news here, of course, is if he's beginning to feel the heat from his extensive list of clients. Mr. Bernstein is known to take huge gambles on characters with questionable personalities but incredible upside.
Most recently with a number of suspensions being handed down by the league, Howard has gone on record calling the claims "ridiculous" and comparing the suspensions to "The Beatles kicking Pete Best out of the band." This was before immediately and ironically saying his client's "were being made an example of" for what he called "everyday activities from every member of the locker room." With so much mystery behind still behind the suspensions, we're here to find out a little more.
Turning into the crowd, the scrum almost begins to crumble in beneath itself as the much larger Sean De Murray pushes his way in. It only requires a few pushes before Sean and his camera man make their way to the front of the scene. Despite the high quality microphone attached to the camera, all of the reporters questions flood into a steady stream of nonsense.
Directly in front of them with his back turned to them all stands none other than one Howard Bernstein. Wearing his standard black suit with matching tie and white dress shirt, Howard stands tall but with his finger up to his left ear and his cell phone. Probably feeling a little overwhelmed, Howard drops the phone to his side and swings to the scrum of reporters with an almost defeated expression. He tilts his head and waving his free arm wildly past his side.
Howard Bernstein
Would you please..?
Widening his eyes, he directs his head to his phone then back to the scrum. Comically, he does the gesture two more times, each more expressive than the last.
With none more needed, the group grows deathly quiet to the point where you could hear the background noise and the exasperation in Howard's voice as he ends his call with whomever he's speaking with.
Howard Bernstein
... This place is how far from the airport?... How far?... Mmm, how brilliant... Yes, yes. Of course I'll talk with him when I get there. Don't you worry your-... I am NOT being sarcastic!.. Fine, fine. Yes, I have some lovely reporters to deal with...
HA! HA!
Howard's laugh is loud and unexpected. A total contrast to his direct and almost dull demeanour.
Howard Bernstein
Amazing... Yes, yes, I'll speak to you when I touchdown. Ta-ta.
Bernstein quickly shoves his phone into his pocket and raises both his hands to silence the crowd before they can even get started.
Howard Bernstein
To start off I have no comments to discuss about the horribly false accusations against my highly, highly talented players. What you'll understand is that whatever you report is just downright... downright...
Snapping his fingers and waving them in the air, Howard seems to be trying to find the appropriate word.
Reporter
... Silly?
With a flash of excitement, Howard flashes a massive wide eyed smile to the reporter who responded.
Howard Bernstein
Yes! That's the one!
As quickly as it showed up, Howard's face drops back to its normal stoic self.
Howard Bernstein
You are all going to look downright silly... So I will abstain from commenting and when you all come rushing up to me next week after my players are reinstated asking me "Oh Mr. Bernstein, Mr. Bernstein how did you know?!" or "Mr. Bernstein, Mr. Bernstein what were the accusations and why were they flung in your direction," I won't have to say I told you so.
Now, what you all should be reporting is that I'm here in, uh... Beautiful... Napa County to make sure this will be up to standard for my newest client. I know you all must be assuming how pretentious it must be to discuss, especially in such a time and place but...
Considering the scrum of reporters appear to be heavily sports focused, hype containing his newest movie star loses the crowd. Noticing one or two of the reporters starting to pack up their cameras and gear, Howard snaps and points directly at Sean.
Howard Bernstein
Would you be kind enough to tell me what Concord is most famous for?
Sean De Murray
Uh... I believe wine, and technology. But I could... Be wrong?
Snapping his fingers and waving his hand, Howard clearly seems to be looking for something more. Sean's response seems to perk up enough attention amongst the scrum of reporters.
Sean De Murray
... Oh and don't they have a pretty big professional wrestling following based out of there.
Howard's stoic expression evolves into a sly smile and shrugs knowingly.
Howard Bernstein
Might be something you boys want to jot down...
Now if you'll excuse me, my limousine is here and it's been oh so fun... Ta-ta!
Howard raises his hand as a sudden slew of questions begin to unload from the scrum of reporters. Entirely ignoring their questions, Howard pushes his way directly forward and shoves his hand right into the frame of the camera, forcing it to static out and fade to the simple "Associated Press: AP" screen.
