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Dec 6, 2009, 6:08am

EVPW :: On Air :: Downtown :: Clown Services, Inc.

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Topic: Clown Services, Inc. (Read 88 times)

Nicholas Carson
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Clown Services, Inc.
« Thread Started on Nov 6, 2009, 4:03am »

In order to compensate for lack of funds due to the many lawsuits and low pay wages in EVPW, Nicholas Carson had recently opened up a side job simply called "Clown Services, Inc". It's a pretty simple gig. He gets called and goes to birthday parties to entertain the people. Sadly though, as he sleeps on his urine stained couch in his narrow abode, no call has come. But timing is everything, his Verizon pay-as-you-go phone begins ringing. The Maniac Mauler slowly rolls out from under his covers and fumbles around until he answers it.

"Hello?"

The voice that comes over the line is a sweet one, very feminine.

"Sir, I am sorry to both you. My name is Teresa, we saw your flyer the other day and snagged it up. We actually had called another individual but he canceled like 5 mins ago and our little Kaycie's party starts in 35 minutes, please help us. We'll pay double."

Nicholas quickly jumps up excitedly, his Captain Planet undies in full view.

"You can count on me, lady. Just give me that addy of yours and I'll see you in a little bit. I am even gonna bring some of my co-workers. This is my first gig actually, and I want it to be all out and special."

He moves through his 1987 school bus-turned-home and puts on some clothes as she rambles off her addy. Upon hanging up, he grabs his already prepared backpack and heads out the exit door and down the makeshift steps. He hops into his 94' El Camino while calling up Demon.

"Hey you big fucker, round up the crew, I need yaw to help me with that side job I was telling yaw about. Okay, bye bye, toodles."

He speeds away in his lil beaner car and travels into Northeastern Concord, California to the addy he has logged in his head. Demon, Dave Carter, and Ryan Hughes are already there and receive him with many brotherly hugs and fist pounds.

"Thanks for showing up guys. Aight, heres what I got. There is a sweet little, undoubtedly hot, 8 year old girl in there and it is her birthday. She is surrounded by her little schoolgirl friends and a few little boys. The only grown ups there are her parents. By the way, her name is Kaycie. Pretty simple, we go in and entertain ourselves. I have got the party balloons and other things in this here backpack."

He opens the pack up and starts handing out items to his fellow Outcasts, all of them quickly dressing up in clown paint, wigs and jester outfits. Ryan raises a hand up.

"Uh... don't you mean to entertain her, not ourselves?"

They all start laughing and pat Hughes on the back, the Batman finally realizing his folly. He laughs along with it and smiles devilishly as they head to the front door and knock on it. The door creaks open and they are greeted by the mom and dad, who look on in a bit of surprise at the odd looking gang of men.

"We're here Teresa. Where is little Kaycie and her little buddies at?

"They uhh are uuuh in the back yard. Follow us, please."

Despite having mixed feelings about letting this crew around the kids, the parents give each other a reassuring nod as they turn to lead the Outcasts. Nicholas realizes that the parents will more than likely want to be present to see their daughter's smiling face during the festivities, which Nicky can not allow. He motions to Demon, who nods and smiles under his mask before suddenly cracking the parents' skulls together, dropping them to the floor. From there, Demon parts from the crew as they burst onto the back yard scene.

There, sitting indian style are a group of kids, ages 7-9. Dave Carter notices that they already have a boombox out there that isn't even playing, which hints to poor partying, and nobody knows partying like Dave. He starts heading towards it while Nicholas holds court.

"Hello ladies and gentlemens, we are tonights entertainment. I am Carson the clown or Clownie Carson, and these men are recent grads of clown school."

Despite the domineering size of the men, the children start clapping and pointing, smiles all over their joyful faces.

"SO LETS HAVE SOME FUN, YAAAY! Okay, where is that birthday girl? Where is Kaycie?"

They all point her out as she gets a sheepish look on her face. Nicholas pulls out a bag of balloons and helium device then starts airing one up as he speaks.

"Birthday girl today is your lucky day because you get the first balloon animal. I would make you a dog or cat or rabbit, but I have got something so much better."

After airing is complete, he does fast handwork and ties the end, making it look like a penis with ball sack. He show-boats it for a moment, confusing the hell out of the kids as to what it is. Nicholas laughs, as does his co-horts, as he tries to hand it to the shy little girl.

"Don't worry, kid. It is just a uhhh, ummm, snake with two apples. He is friendly, his name is Sammy the snake. You can even pet him, come on, don't be afraid."

Kaycie, as well as a few others gather around it and start slowly petting it, Nicholas snickering like a sick pedophile. He even whispers under his breath some...

"Yeah, thats it. He likes that, yes."

Demon pops up from some brush in the yard and flings a glob of mayonnaise at Kaycie, hitting her smack dab in the face. He then runs away laughing his ass off while Nicholas lets out a seductive little moan. Ryan finds it the most amusing, pointing at her while calling the play.

"Gaaahahahahha, Moneyshot! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

Dave Carter, having finally turned the boom box on and found a good high beat techno station, speaks up as he starts doing a little dance.

"Time to break out the moves, bitches. The party starter is in full swing."

He says the last part sarcastically as he breaks into a full blown dance that culminates into him doing some freestyle moves. He suddenly does a cool spin on his head trick, but wheels his foot around, purposely slamming it violently against Kaycie's head. The little girl does a somersault flip and lands unconscious. Dave pops up laughing sadistically, a mix of arrogance and hate etched on his face.

"BOOM! Headshot! Have a shitty fucking birthday, bitch."

Obviously, the other kids start screaming and running around like chickens with their heads cut off. The Outcasts become even angrier by this.

"What? Yaw ain't gonna sing happy birthday to Kaycie? What a shitty group of friends yaw are. Oh fuck no, fuck that, we gonna wish her and sing her a happy birthday."

Ryan manages to catch two little girls by their ponytails and Dave catches one by the scruff of her neck. Nicholas, oddly enough, catches a little boy who is portly and ugly, just like he was at that age.

"Happy Birthday to you..."

Ryan starts spinning around in a airplane spin circle, lifting the two girls easily off of the ground.

"Happy Birthday to you..."

He suddenly lets go of them, sending one girl crashing into the wooden fence surrounding the back yard, while the other winds up smacking against a concrete pillar at the corner of the house. Dave Carter presses his captured kid over his head and chunks her towards Carson who, in turn, hikes his foot into the air, big booting her out of the air.

"Happy Birthday dear Kayciiiiiieeeeeeeee...Happy birthday to....yoooooouuuuu."

Instead of harming the little boy he had captured, Nicholas forces him over to the KO'd body of Kaycie, feeling somewhat sympathetic towards him.

"Don't cry, kid. I am going to spare you from what has happened to your buddies. You remind me of me far too much. Nobody warned me or cared enough about me to teach me things. I am telling you now, you will never have a girlfriend, you will never have sex unless you force it. This girl here, Kaycie, she is a little cutie pie and will grow into a beautiful young woman, a woman who will forget who you are the first chance she gets. Today, you will get what you will be denied later in life and when it is said and done, 10 or 20 years from now you will thank me. So, close your eyes and let Nicky show you."

The kid, fearing for his life, does as he is told. Nicholas slowly forces the blubbery kid on top of Kaycie and shoves his face sternly against hers, making the kid's mouth come open. When this happens, he orders the kid to stick his tongue out. Like before, the kid obeys and slides his tongue into Kaycie's mouth in a sick, forced French kiss. From there, Nicholas guides the boy's hand southward towards Kaycie's most private of places when he is suddenly yanked away by Dave and Ryan. They quickly warn him of the noise in the distance, police sirens.

"FUCKING COPS! Lets go, gotta go. Come on come on, hurry hurry."

Nicholas, Ryan and Dave begin to make a hurried retreat, but not before scooping up all of Kaycie's birthday presents yet to be opened. Finally, they emerge from the house and pile the presents into Nicholas' El Camino as he jumps in and cranks the car up. Demon is already in his vehicle, which he carried Dave and Ryan in earlier. They jump in it and the crew of Outcasts speed away.

EOT (bored as fuck, was supposed to work tonight but they changed the damn schedule on me but didn't tell me lol.)

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